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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 12, 2018 13:47:19 GMT
Right, so you're down your local boozer sinking a few pints, playin arrows with a few of your mates... Sandra the buxom, pretty, young barmaid has just wobbled her way over to your table with another round of drinks and some packets of pork scratchings. You smile and thank her and she winks back at you as she returns behind the bar. You're having a good time and everyone is relaxed and enjoying themselves, your darts have been good today and you've won a lot more games than you've lost. There is a friendly atmosphere and everyone in the pub is getting along fine.... ....That is until a bunch of bikers show up, already drunk, aggressive and mouthy, they proceed to take over the bar. They start by putting 'Yes' and 'Genesis' on the juke box on purpose just to annoy everyone and then sure enough they begin to get rowdier and rowdier as the drinks flow, pushing around the locals and man-handling Sandra. A glass is knocked over and a few of the locals scurry out the back door. You look over at your mates in silence and exchange knowing glances that any minute it's going to kick off, and you praise the lord that you have the sense never to wear silly impractical footwear like flip-flops, in case of manly emergencies such as this. A big, ugly lookin bearded biker, who stands about 6'5" and appears to be heavier than a cement truck, is leaning over the bar, laughing, pawing behind it in a drunken effort to try and reach Sandra, who looks terrified. One of your friends gets up, walks over and politely asks Cement Truck to 'take it easy' and to 'stop being a nuisance'. But Cement Truck doesn't look open to your friend's suggestions and he snatches up a bottle, neck first, and snarls in your friend's face before raising the bottle in threat. Uninterested in a fair fight, the other bikers stand up and go to crowd round your pal, grinning, but you're not about to let your friend face them alone, so along with your other pals you stand up and walk directly over to the mob of bikers, seemingly on a collision course... So this weeks DM asks: Who do YOU want as your mates in this bar fight? Who were YOU playing darts with that day? Pick 4 Choices:  Darba from Spartacus  Raven  Steven Seagull  The Hanson Brothers  Biffa Bacon's Mutha ![]()  Begbie  Carrie White  Lemmy  Brannigan  Kwai Chang Caine  Evel Knievel  Trog  Jack Carter  Tarzan  Coffy  Santo y Blue Demon  Jean Jacques Burnel  Zetan Warlord  Chun Li from Streetfighter II  Terry McCann  McGill  Clyde  Chiun & Remo Williams  'The Prowler' controlled by Chuck Norris  Oliver Reed drunk playing Athos  Chaney  Col. Vincent Kane  Slaine  Frankenstein's Monster From Hell  Parker |
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Post by ace5150 on Jun 12, 2018 15:02:57 GMT
Too many in the list would act as peacemakers. I want a few volatile scrappers in my corner, not afraid to take a few lumps. I only picked 3, can we opt for "other" and say who?
I'd have Chuck Norris over Kwai Chang Caine any day, but he's not on the list.
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Post by ace5150 on Jun 12, 2018 15:50:15 GMT
Chuck Norris had a role in Star Wars.
He WAS the Force.
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 12, 2018 15:52:27 GMT
Too many in the list would act as peacemakers. I want a few volatile scrappers in my corner, not afraid to take a few lumps. I only picked 3, can we opt for "other" and say who? I'd have Chuck Norris over Kwai Chang Caine any day, but he's not on the list. No other option on purpose. Chuck Norris doesn't drink in that pub. He may drink in another pub you have a fight in in the future though. Peacemakers? With the exceptions of Kwai Chang Caine, Santo y Blue Demon, Carrie, Terry, Col. Vincent Kane and McGill, that list is full of unpredictable hellers... And even then I have my doubts about Carrie! |
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Post by ace5150 on Jun 12, 2018 15:59:38 GMT
So many there I've not heard of.
Jax from Sons of Anarchy would be a good option, his biker gang against the trouble making biker gang would be good.
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 12, 2018 16:03:13 GMT
 I don't see why anyone wouldn't have Zetan Warlord in their corner. Look at that guy's stats.. Physical strength 98, Killing Power 95, Horror Rating 92..... Who needs Chuck Norris?! Chuck Norris's wig might get a few chuckles but it's hardly got a Horror Rating of 92! Looking at his shirt I bet he has some badass flares on too. |
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 12, 2018 16:20:42 GMT
Slaine, he's another one. When that guy 'warp spasms' he can massacre armies. Never mind a bar full of rowdies. Raven by Richard Kirk too... Swordmistress of Chaos. Man she was cool. She always used to get stuck in and kick @ss. If bras had been invented in her era, she'd have burnt hers for sure. Here's her topless (yet again!) fighting some monsters on the cover of the second book. She knew how to fight.  |
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 12, 2018 16:21:31 GMT
Every sensible villain would brick it after meeting The Prowler.
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Post by jno on Jun 12, 2018 18:44:29 GMT
Parker off Thunderbirds?!  |
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 12, 2018 19:01:15 GMT
Parker off Thunderbirds?! No. Parker as in the Richard Stark character. There were lots of books. The films featuring him are: Point Blank The Outfit The Split Payback Parker Etc |
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Post by ltd on Jun 12, 2018 19:42:04 GMT
I went for Col "Killer" Kane as he can slaughter a bar full of miscreant bikers by himself. Takes him a while to warm up though so early match I'd play Terry out of nostalgia's sake plus Biffa's Mum 'cos she is just nails.
Wouldn't want Parker backing me up - he only gives a toss about himself and just helps others when there's something in it for him or because he knows it's expected and nobody would work with him if he didn't abide by the criminals' unwritten law. Still wouldn't trust him not to do a bunk though, especially if the police arrive on the scene.
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Post by ace5150 on Jun 12, 2018 19:56:19 GMT
I'd put Joe Pesci and Graeme Souness in that list, they'd do the business.
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 12, 2018 20:13:02 GMT
I opted for Slaine. Coz he's hard enough as he is, but he also has that warp spasm capability,
Which means that once he's off the leash you can just leave him to it.
I also voted for Zetan Warlord. I have no idea who or what he is other than he makes an appearance in my Dubreq horror top trumps.
He is a pretty tough card so I assume he's a handful.
Chaney is as tough as a nickel steak.
Proper fisticuffs. Depression era America's toughest bare knuckle boxer.
He'd be good at watching your back I reckon.
Finally I opted for Chiun & Remo Williams from The Destroyer series of novels.
Expert assassins. Masters of Sinanju. Rock hard.
There's a reason why these two have nearly a 175 book series under their belts.
That's a lot of assassinations.
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Post by fordcapri on Jun 12, 2018 20:55:50 GMT
I think Bodie should be on this list too - seeing as he can obviously disarm a potentially dangerous situation and make a big, nasty biker sh*t his pants and back down just with a glare. ('Wild Justice'). And, of course, together with his trusty partner in crime, can see off a bunch of them without so much as breaking a sweat. ('Mixed Doubles'). His omission from the list is, therefore, shameful and should be explained forthwith.
In the absence of our very own William Andrew Philip, I would probably nominate Evel Knievel. Then, if it really gets nasty, we can hop on his bike, jump through the (upstairs) window and escape over the roofs of a dozen stationary London buses. If there's room for 'Raven' on the back of the bike as well, all the better...
Additionally, I would choose Jean Jacques Burnel, as I've heard he's a bit 'handy' and once knocked Hugh Cornwell through a wall, and Terry McCann.
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 12, 2018 21:49:47 GMT
I think Bodie should be on this list too - seeing as he can obviously disarm a potentially dangerous situation and make a big, nasty biker sh*t his pants and back down just with a glare. (' Wild Justice'). And, of course, together with his trusty partner in crime, can see off a bunch of them without so much as breaking a sweat. (' Mixed Doubles'). His omission from the list is, therefore, shameful and should be explained forthwith. Good grief how many more times do I have to explain this to people?? I am beginning to sound like a broken record. The Death Match Overlord spends a great amount of personal time weighing up all possibilities for your amusement. Death Matches are not just done on a whim. When people like Chuck Norris or Bodie or Geoff Capes or whoever, are omitted from a DM like this, it isn't because I've forgotten about them, it's because they may appear in a different one instead. Which is exactly why I didn't give you an option for OTHER in this particular DM either. All possibilities are taken into account, then some are dismissed. When certain choices are left out of a Death Match there is a good reason for it. Sleep soundly knowing this. Bodie doesn't drink in that boozer you were playing darts in. Okay? He drinks in a different one around the corner. Therefore one day he may make an appearance in that boozer. Sides which Bodie wouldnt last two minutes against Biffa Bacon's mutha, so let's keep it a bit real can we.. |
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Post by daz on Jun 13, 2018 6:20:20 GMT
Begbie for me. Even if he didn't win the fight at the boozer you would have to sleep with one eye open afterwards.
Lemmie and JJB as both really hard men and went for McGill as although he tried to be a diplomat he did love a ruck.
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Post by ltd on Jun 13, 2018 6:43:12 GMT
I'd put Joe Pesci and Graeme Souness in that list, they'd do the business. Pesci only in his Stella Street incarnation though.  |
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 13, 2018 7:31:13 GMT
It's called a code of silence. That's why no ones talking about it. |
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Post by plasticpenguin on Jun 13, 2018 8:30:28 GMT
Right, so you're down your local boozer sinking a few pints, playin arrows with a few of your mates... Sandra the buxom, pretty, young barmaid has just wobbled her way over to your table with another round of drinks and some packets of pork scratchings. You smile and thank her and she winks back at you as she returns behind the bar. You're having a good time and everyone is relaxed and enjoying themselves, your darts have been good today and you've won a lot more games than you've lost. There is a friendly atmosphere and everyone in the pub is getting along fine.... ....That is until a bunch of bikers show up, already drunk, aggressive and mouthy, they proceed to take over the bar. They start by putting 'Yes' and 'Genesis' on the juke box on purpose just to annoy everyone and then sure enough they begin to get rowdier and rowdier as the drinks flow, pushing around the locals and man-handling Sandra. A glass is knocked over and a few of the locals scurry out the back door. You look over at your mates in silence and exchange knowing glances that any minute it's going to kick off, and you praise the lord that you have the sense never to wear silly impractical footwear like flip-flops, in case of manly emergencies such as this. A big, ugly lookin bearded biker, who stands about 6'5" and appears to be heavier than a cement truck, is leaning over the bar, laughing, pawing behind it in a drunken effort to try and reach Sandra, who looks terrified. One of your friends gets up, walks over and politely asks Cement Truck to 'take it easy' and to 'stop being a nuisance'. But Cement Truck doesn't look open to your friend's suggestions and he snatches up a bottle, neck first, and snarls in your friend's face before raising the bottle in threat. Uninterested in a fair fight, the other bikers stand up and go to crowd round your pal, grinning, but you're not about to let your friend face them alone, so along with your other pals you stand up and walk directly over to the mob of bikers, seemingly on a collision course... So this weeks DM asks: Who do YOU want as your mates in this bar fight? Who were YOU playing darts with that day? Blimey! Your hypothetical scenario looks like a Professionals synopsis. You must be joking! Hairy bikers putting on Genesis? www.hairybikers.com/about#5FWsYsZcOlr0f9j1.97 |
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Post by fordcapri on Jun 13, 2018 9:38:45 GMT
I'm sure I've seen Bodie in there at least once, it was on a Saturday afternoon during a televised Liverpool v Spurs match that the pub were showing. To be fair though, he was only drinking Britvic 55 and didn't seem interested in playing darts or fighting.
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 13, 2018 13:27:38 GMT
Yes the Death Match scenario was for fun. |
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Post by plasticpenguin on Jun 13, 2018 13:32:18 GMT
Yes the Death Match scenario was for fun. Really?  |
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Post by ace5150 on Jun 13, 2018 23:26:08 GMT
Always worth a laugh, especially the barmans wig getting wretched off.
"Now yous can't leave"
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Post by jno on Jun 14, 2018 4:02:52 GMT
Parker off Thunderbirds?! No. Parker as in the Richard Stark character. There were lots of books. The films featuring him are: Point Blank The Outfit The Split Payback Parker Etc Yes M'Lady |
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Post by KarinB on Jun 15, 2018 11:02:04 GMT
I think Bodie should be on this list too - seeing as he can obviously disarm a potentially dangerous situation and make a big, nasty biker sh*t his pants and back down just with a glare. (' Wild Justice'). And, of course, together with his trusty partner in crime, can see off a bunch of them without so much as breaking a sweat. (' Mixed Doubles'). His omission from the list is, therefore, shameful and should be explained forthwith. In the absence of our very own William Andrew Philip, I would probably nominate Evel Knievel. Then, if it really gets nasty, we can hop on his bike, jump through the (upstairs) window and escape over the roofs of a dozen stationary London buses. If there's room for ' Raven' on the back of the bike as well, all the better... Additionally, I would choose Jean Jacques Burnel, as I've heard he's a bit 'handy' and once knocked Hugh Cornwell through a wall, and Terry McCann. Well I think you're right (even though it's against the Death Match rules  ) Bodie would fight until there was no one left to fight and still manage to arrange a dinner date afterwards. Well an ex mercenary, para trooper and SAS officer has got to come in handy at times. Apart from him how about Andre the Giant ? Paying his bar tab would be costly but no one would be able to flatten him. |
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Post by Arch Stanton on Jun 16, 2018 7:10:42 GMT
Well I think you're right (even though it's against the Death Match rules ) Bodie would fight until there was no one left to fight and still manage to arrange a dinner date afterwards. Well an ex mercenary, para trooper and SAS officer has got to come in handy at times. Cobblers! Bodie? Pah! He would get chinned once off Biffa Bacon's 'mutha' and he'd need therapy for the rest of his life, never mind a dinner date. |
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Post by KarinB on Jun 16, 2018 10:21:15 GMT
Well I think you're right (even though it's against the Death Match rules ) Bodie would fight until there was no one left to fight and still manage to arrange a dinner date afterwards. Well an ex mercenary, para trooper and SAS officer has got to come in handy at times. Cobblers! Bodie? Pah! He would get chinned once off Biffa Bacon's 'mutha' and he'd need therapy for the rest of his life, never mind a dinner date.  Biffa Bacon ? Tommy from 'Goodfellas' would be a crazy, scary but effective backup. |
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Post by ltd on Jun 16, 2018 15:01:43 GMT
Cobblers! Bodie? Pah! He would get chinned once off Biffa Bacon's 'mutha' and he'd need therapy for the rest of his life, never mind a dinner date. Biffa Bacon ? Here you go Karin, this should explain all:
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Post by bensonrad on Jun 25, 2018 22:01:03 GMT
If its a bar room location, I would go for some tried and tested, Terry, Jack Carter and Begbie, I would be hiding behind the bar telling my 4th choice Clyde Right Turn.
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larchlapriley
On Wages
"Larchlap Riley is not a fence. He is an honest businessman" Arthur E Daley
Posts: 64 
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Post by larchlapriley on Jul 2, 2018 11:13:00 GMT
If Terry McCann is available, what would I want with three others? :-)
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) Bodie would fight until there was no one left to fight and still manage to arrange a dinner date afterwards. 
Biffa Bacon ? 
